The key to happiness

The key to a happy life seems to be this: gratefulness. The Scriptures talk a lot about it. "Whatever state I am in I have learned to be content" -- loosely translated from Paul. As I observe others around me, strangers and friends alike, I see a common thread. If someone is able to count their blessings, they are generally happy, no matter if they are poor or rich. On the other hand, if they constantly feel short-changed or bitter, nothing can satisfy them.

I have an old friend, who is not old, who is truly gifted. He is a master carpenter, can sell ice cubes to an Eskimo (gifted seller), artistic eye and brain, beautiful wife who adores him, and several gorgeous children who thinks he hung the moon. But guess what? He is so bitter and sour at God, he thinks that he has been given a dirty deal. Even with all that wonderful stuff. He has a blessed life, but cannot even see what is right in front of him. If he does not learn to see the good (or to be grateful to God), I am afraid all these beautiful things will begin to backfire on him. If the best things in life don't satisfy, then what else is there? And what happens when more bad things happen, as is usually the case?

I recall my old mentor, Dr. Denmark (and she really was old)... she was my children's pediatrician and lived to be 113 years old. She was talking about the gift of life and how we should wake up every day and thank God for everything, even the bad things. She said that everyone deserves a chance to live, that even a sunrise when you are lying in a gutter is a miracle. 

I haven't lived in a gutter yet, and hopefully won't have to.... but I do remember when we were living in our camper for those two years. At first it was very wacky to wake up in this little, beat-up space and try to remember if we were sane or not. Then we adjusted in myriad ways, to the constraints of our situation. It was amazing to me that we could live like that and really be happy. But we were. Yes, we had the advent of a beautiful home that we were building (virtually) ourselves, so there was the hope of that.... but when the day came when we moved into the big house, I had some sorrow about leaving the camper. I knew that we were okay in that camper and that we would never again be as close (ha!) as that and as dependent on one another as we had been. I also, in some ways, didn't feel worthy to live in a big house when I knew living in our "hut" was really all we needed. They say that when you visit a third-world country it will ratchet up your appreciation of America and all that we enjoy. I haven't done that yet, but waking up in a real house after dreaming about a cocoon in a camper sometimes still catches me by surprise. God has blessed us with our beautiful old Victorian a year and a half ago, and some days we wake up thinking we are in a bed-and-breakfast. So who's making breakfast?!

But back to gratefulness... even in my most blessed days, I can fret and worry about something. I seem to manufacture things to worry about. If I haven't worried about this child or this grandchild in awhile, it must be time to chew on that. Worry leads to ungratefulness as well.

It seems that I ponder a lot of things as I'm taking the dog out for her potty break. We live right in town and so there is traffic going by and usually a pedestrian or two to wave at. In the midst of that, our property has an old gothic wrought-iron fence around it and huge trees in the yard. So I am in this little Victorian world for a few minutes. If it's dark, the sky always amazes me with the clear moon and stars, the trees lit against the sky. If it's light, I can see the old plantings in the yard and wonder about all the people that have lived here and wandered around this same yard. It's in these moments that I really try to remember how God has blessed me, to thank Him for His goodness, and to center my heart on all that He has sent, whether it seems good or bad to me. He's promised:  "And we know that for those who love God all things work together for good, for those who are called according to his purpose." Rom. 8:28  
Definitely one of the great mysteries of life.

I have seen people in the midst of the worst kinds of sorrows who are able to look up and find grace and hope through it. I have also seen people in the midst of great blessing and success that are griping because they've been given a raw deal.

Which of those women do I want to be?